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Deus If you see someone just randomly removing their iPod headphones on the bus or the Tube you can be pretty sure they're gauging how loud their fart is.
Kate puns Whenever the cashier at the grocery store asks my dad if he would like the milk in a bag he replies, ‘No, just leave it in the carton!’
Deus blonde I've just invented an invisibility cloak; anything under it is rendered completely invisible. I'm still working out the kinks; you can still see the cloak itself.
TheOneWhoKnocks knock knock jokes Knock, knock. Who's there? Broccoli. Broccoli who? Broccoli doesn't have a last name, silly.
Mark14 puns I went to a book store and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section was, she said if she told me it would defeat the purpose.